Wednesday, February 17, 2010

How to Communicate with your Non-Human Friends

Pay Attention!! Animals only have bodily functions to work with.  They can't cuss you out, give you the finger, or slash your tires.  They can only holler at you or poop on your bed to let you know that all is not right in their world.  Now figure it out!

The negative energy radiating out of Gabriel, our stallion, can mean: "feed me"; "my water bucket has poop in it"; "I'm cold"; "I'm hot"; "the bugs are biting me"; there's a clod of crud in my sheath"; "I have freaking ticks on my thigh next to my junk and it's bugging me"'; etc.  After hours of my shouting "Shut up! What is wrong with you?" I do indeed figure it out.  Gabriel says "What..are you stupid?  I've been telling you this for hours."

I am so used to my animals communicating with me every single day that I don't even think about it anymore.  My horses really do love me, I know that, I know that I am their leader and they would follow me through fire.  But they also know that I feed them, and sometimes their communication is just too loud!  Thirteen horses screaming at me every time they think it's time to eat is just too much. 

Visitors will say, "Oh, look how much they love you! They were so quiet until you walked in!"  Trust me, it's not love.  They know I'm the food mama and because of that they greet me with a thunderous joyful noise!  I not so joyfully thunder back, "Shut up, you selfish bunch of babies!"  And they do.  So most of the time, if I pay attention, I can figure out what they want, but there are many times that I am just plain stupid.